Trying It On For Size

I was surprised at the powerful, erotic effect that old photo set had on me. Although sexually submissive (at least in fantasy and fantasy act outs), I had always thought of myself as one hundred percent hetero. In fact, the few times I had seen "gay" porn I had not been sexually aroused, in fact it actually repulsed me. Watching two hairy muscular guys go at it did nothing for me. After seeing Carnal Candy's photo set and acknowledging its effect on me, I began looking at some transsexual porn - photos, videos and stories. I was curious about why I was so aroused by the Candy set.

I found that I was not aroused by transsexual porn unless the t-girl was topping the male. The more dominant the t-girl, the more arousing it was for me. Throw in some bondage and a sensually aggressive t-girl and the effect on me was over the top - as strong or stronger than any other type of porn - including Femdom strap-on play. I began to understand just why strap-on play held such an appeal for me. It was actually an approximation of dominant t-girl action. As much as I enjoyed strap-on play, I always felt there was something missing. Perhaps that something was penetration by living, feeling flesh - feeling the effect I was having on it; actually having it grow, stiffen and swell and eventually cum in response to me. Regardless of how skilled the strap-on wielding Domme, silicon members just can't do that.

As I looked at transsexual porn, I found that I was attracted to and aroused by certain types of t-girls. First, she had to be feminine looking with a full bust and rounded hips. Heavily made-up, cross-dressed transvestites did nothing for me. She had to be female looking in all but genitalia. Second, the dick itself had to be - how shall I put this - large. The well-endowed t-girl had a far more powerful erotic effect on me than even the most otherwise luscious looking but poorly endowed shemale. Perhaps it had to do with my need for a power exchange in the fantasy and the large dick represented power and dominance to me. I don't know. But there it was - I had to recognize and acknowledge just what it was that was capable of turning me on so.