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The Babysitter's Secret Part 2

"I don't understand," I said.

"When I was in college," she said, "I used to . . . you know . . . experiment with other girls. I liked it a lot but I always liked men more. Being with another woman is nice but I guess . . . well . . ." she laughed. "I guess I just like dick too much."

"When did you stop experimenting?"

"Right when we first started dating seriously," she told me. "Remember the night you asked me to move in with you? I told you that I needed a night to think about it. The next day, I hooked up with my friend April. We'd fooled around a few times before. Then that was it. I thought I just needed to get it out of my system."

"But it never really left, I'm assuming."

"No. Over the years that we've been married, I've been thinking about it more and more often. I guess it was never just a phase. Maybe I really am bisexual."

"OK, so what happened with your coworker?"

"Remember Janey? You met her at the Christmas party? Well, she and I were talking that night after we'd had a few and she confessed she was into women. For some reason, I told her I was too. She said that if I ever felt like being with one, she'd be open to it. It took a year but finally I couldn't fight it any more. I told Janey that I wanted to have sex with her and we arranged this thing."

"And what happened?"

"We had sex. But it was like before. It was unsatisfying. There was just something missing. I liked the way she looked, smelled, felt . . . but she couldn't meet all of my needs. Does that make sense?"

"Yes," I admitted.

"I'm so sorry, Peter. Please forgive me. It'll never happen again."

"I should be asking for your forgiveness," I said, after a long moment.

"For what?" she asked. "This wasn't your fault."

"Not for that," I said. "I've been unfaithful too."

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