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Except from Book

Francine recounts some of her past.

"When I first met Hank it was in the city square by the fountains. I thought he was so handsome and noted his outgoing likable personality. He took notice of me smiling his fetching smile. Thinking I was a freak I was reluctant to be too forward until he approached me and any resistance I may have had was gone. Finding anyone like Hank to accept me was foolish I thought. Nevertheless I was so happy when he invited me to dinner that evening. I accepted of course and halfway through dinner he took hold of my hand telling me how lovely I was. It was clear he had romantic intentions but before it went further, I felt it best to tell him I might not be what I appeared to be.

When he asked me what I meant I felt vulnerable and uncertain if I was brave enough to do so. Eventually, after squirming around in my seat, I told him my secret. I'll never forget it, his jaw dropped and he looked at me in disbelief. I didn't know if he thought I was kidding or not and waited for him to see my sincerity. When he saw I was serious, he threw his napkin down on his plate startling me before abruptly standing to leave I thought. Maybe he was calling my bluff and wanted to see if I would recant but when I just sat there looking at him, he seemed to melt slowly sitting back down in his chair as though he had been deflated. He looked around seeing no one could hear us and asked,

"You mean you have a...?"

I smiled seeing he had a hard time using the word as I shook my head 'yes' still not knowing if he believed me. I told him he should know right away before and if we got involved. I thought if he were to see me naked and rejected me; I would be devastated and humiliated. When he assured me he wouldn't reject for that and even said it was a bonus. This seemed too good to be true, if indeed he was being honest with me. I mean what kind of a man would want a woman with a penis? I've always had misgivings about my mixed sexuality and never assumed a woman's identity for sexual reasons; my decision was for my own sanity."

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